My goal for 2015 was to achieve balance in my life. And guess what? It never happened. If anything 2015 was our busiest year yet!
Truthfully, I enjoy staying busy. I love being surrounded by people, and part of something bigger than myself. However, I took on way more than I should have last year.
It’s hard sometimes to be a good wife, sister, daughter, aunt, person. I really strive to be the person who is there for everyone, but sometimes…it’s just too much.
Don’t get me wrong, wanting/needing/craving that fulfillment is why I feel like Jason and I have so many amazing people in our life. I also think that attitude is why I had such luck in 2015 with my day job, blog, and life in general. I was able to experience some really amazing things in 2015.
But I felt (feel) stressed pretty much all.the.time. I feel like there is always something that needs to be done. Whether it’s a blog post for a client, a house that needs to be cleaned, a nephew to pay attention to, or friends I need to catch up with. Sometimes, I just feel overwhelmed by it all.
I used to think I needed to strive for a better balance, but in those rare free moments last year, my free time was spent most of the time wasting life online, or looking for something to watch on one of the 1100 or so channels we have. And I realized, my life is insanely busy partly because well, that’s life. But also, because I have unintentionally designed it this way. Most of us have, without even knowing it.
We have so much “stuff” to fill our time. Time we don’t even have, so then we just have stuff to have it, which in turn stresses me out, because I hate clutter.
I think in order for me to achieve balance, I have to simplify so much in my life to get where I need to be.
Do I need all this “stuff”? So I need three computers, a kindle, smart phone, etc? I am connected all the time. Sometimes to kill time, I’m just scrolling through different avenues of social media…just because.
I can’t tell you the last time I read a book for fun.
I want to lose weight (story of my lifffffe) and improve my running, but when I wake up, my mind instantly starts buzzing full of e.v.e.r.y.t.h.i.n.g. else I need to do.
I work really well with deadlines, and I work well under pressure, but I feel like it never ever stops.
I need to be more present with the tasks at hand, instead of wasting time and putting off what IS important by scrolling the interwebz, looking for something to watch on TV (p.s. there never seems to be anything actually on TV anyway), etc.
So in order to find balance, I think I need to be more present and simplify all of the “stuff” in my life. I think if I can achieve this, I will find some much needed inner-peace, which will allow me to enjoy the ride that much more.
It really is a beautiful life. xo